For the most part Ted was pretty great. I mean I disagreed with him on some minor points, but on the major overarching theme he was saying I agreed completely. Mainly what he talked about was marriage, relationships (basically dating), and a little about parenting. More specifically on Tuesday he talked about symptoms of a stuck marriage and the solution to each symptom. Wednesday he talked about different kinds of trophy parents, the unnecessary delays of marriage, and also about how adolescence is being delayed more and more these days, especially for this generation. Finally, on Thursday he talked about six levels of communication/intimacy, how to get to level six, and the positive and negative effects of social media. There is your brief description of the week, but let's get into those famous five things I learned or that stood out to me this week.
1) This was a little bit of a funny quote thingy that he said, but it was this..."Everyone falls in love with the front of the puppy, but every puppy has a back side." While slightly humorous, this quote rings true. So many times we just want to look at the front side, that cute little face and everything. But to every good person there is some junk that has got to be dealt with.
2) I became very thankful throughout this whole week, but especially on Wednesday. This is when Ted talked about the "Seven Kinds of Trophy Parents". To help you understand and save me time here are the "kinds".
1. Vanity Parenting - Trying to use your kids accomplishments to others. Try to show their kids off.
2. Perfection Parenting - Raises the bar constantly for their kids. Want them to be successful in every
area.
3. Competitive Parenting - Constantly comparing the strengths of one child to the other child.
4. R.O.I (Returned on Investment) - What you put into your kid is what you expect out of it. Example
of kid just quitting something. Changed with different seasons.
5. Rescue Parenting - Swooping in and saving the kids from consequences.
6. Gifted Parenting - Live with the idea that God did something special with their kid and not with
others. Usually with infertility or adoption.
7. Companion Parenting - Elevates the child to spouse or comes down to the level of sibling to the
child.
Now these are kinda sort because I basically copied and pasted my notes right there, so if you have any questions and wish me to expand feel free to ask. Really my point is I am super thankful my parents didn't fall into any of these categories and makes me feel more blessed the more I learn. Shout out to madre and padre basically.
3) He talked about what he called, "The Four C's of Dating/Marriage". They were character, chemistry, competency, and calling. He said the only non-negotiable is character which I agree with, but also think at different times calling should be thought of, but that's just me. I digress.
4) He talked a lot about how rarely is the issue actually the real issue. This was a good thing to hear because usually when talking to people they latch onto something and pretend it's the actual problem when really there is something much deeper to look at.
5) LUV talk. Which is basically listen, understand, and validate. It was a clever lil acronym and a good way to remember how to actually get to the deep part of a relationship. This tied into the whole six levels of communication and intimacy. Good stuff to learn, have down in my computer, and apply in life.
Well everybody, that is it for this week. Sorry for the lack of creative material this week, just trying to get back into the flow of things.
And remember people...saying, "I'm sorry" and "I apologize" are the exact same thing, except at a funeral. Think about it.
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